Monday, January 5, 2009

A Blackout And New Beginnings

Shortly after making my post on New Year's Eve our electricity went out. Needless to say, it was completely unexpected! So, I lit my oil lamp and some candles and continued to read until I got a headache. Note-to-self: Use unscented candles when the lights go out!

I've been thinking a lot over the last few days about the fresh start the New Year brings. My pondering has led me to this quote by J.K. Rowling:

"It is our choices... that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."

I tend to agree, but find myself struggling with the lingering effects of a series of choices I made back in the summer of 2007. Now, they weren't necessarily bad choices and I truly believe that the choices we make are done so because we feel them to be the best given our circumstance(s). However, the unknown and uncertainty following our choices is always a risk to take.

For most of 2008 I felt as though I wasn't really living my life. If that makes any sense. I felt flat in all regards -- creatively, spiritually, you name it; mulling around in this pseudo-existence waiting for the fog to clear and the anxious inner-workings of my life to sprout up and live again. With that said, I am stretching forth my hands to greet and welcome 2009 with hopes that the wrinkles will iron themselves out and that my soul will carry a joyous tune.

My breaths are rhythmic
like water lapping against the shore
constant
whilst I wade in tepid currents
unsure of where I am being led,
yet mirthful to know
I am safe on my journey.

14 comments:

Unknown said...

I'm so glad to have discovered your blog. This post was wonderfully melancholic, hopeful and thought-provoking all at the same time.

Choice, at times, scares me. There's so many to make, and so many things that could go wrong. The what-may-have-happened's are always in my mind. Here's hoping 2009 is a fresh start for you!

xx

P.S. I hope the electricity is back on and I've linked to you!

Ana said...

Using candles is so romantic.

I hope 2009 is more clear for you.

Erin Cathleen said...

I second this blog post! Seriously, I've been referring to 2008 as my "lost" year, because it's been so stagnant... Or maybe just I have. :P I've been so tired of having hopes and goals and dreams and just getting nothing done. So here's to '09, and let's hope that both of us can do the things we long to accomplish and feel creatively, spiritually and emotionally fulfilled. :)

Emily, Resplendent Tranquility said...

Ana B. - Thank you for your kind words! Yes, the electricity was back on after about 3 hours :)

Ana - Yes, it is a romantic feeling! And thank you :)

Erin - I'm tipping my glass to that! XOXO

Andrea Eames said...

I know exactly what you mean. I used to describe it to people as living life with my contact lenses out - everything was blurred and indistinct.

I hope 2009 is better for us both! :)

Anonymous said...

i love the songs on your playlist! =) thanks so much for sharing them... am off to download a couple now...

you've got a really lovely blog! perhaps on hindsight we'll always be harsher on ourselves with regards to how we lived our lives...at least we always have tomorrow to look forward to. hope 2009 will be a fulfilling and meaningful one for you.

Emily, Resplendent Tranquility said...

a cat of impossible colour - oh, thats a good way of describing it too. i think perhaps we should be absolutely determined to make 2009 a great year!

detailsofthefabric - thank you so much! :)

Amelia said...

Lovely candles--I love the 2nd picture. Here's to 2009 being better. (It feels funny to type 2009.)

I haven't quite met the requirements to declare a major, but I'm definitely going to declare history and I'm thinking about applying for photography, as well.

Emily, Resplendent Tranquility said...

Amelia - Thank you :)
I wrote out 2009 today and it felt so strange! Same feeling every year though ;)

Rebecca, A Clothes Horse said...

Life by candlelight is not cool! I lived without power one winter for about two weeks...it was miserable--cold showers too!
Good luck with 2009. If you're determined to make something of it, you certainly can.

yiqin; said...

I had a blackout on xmas eve too :( Don't worry, 2009 will be so awesome for you :D

Lauren said...

I'm so glad that I found your blog. Your posts are so thoughtful; I absolutely love those two photos of the candles and oil lamp. Good luck in the New Year, I've kind of been experiencing similar feelings in 2008 an hoping this year will be different. Can I link you on my blog?

Emily, Resplendent Tranquility said...

The Clothes Horse - That does sound miserable! Thankfully didn't stay out that long! Thank you for your kind comment :)

Yiqin - Thank you! :)

Lauren - Thank you very much! :)

Andrea Eames said...

Hello lovely! I have tagged you :)